Some of the strangest things in life happen when you are half asleep. One of those odd things happened today when I headed for the kitchen to drink a second cup of tea. I made my first cup and put my tea bag on the counter, what I failed to notice was that the counter did not get wiped off last night and crumbs of garlic bread stuck to my tea bag. As you can imagine, I now have a cup of tea with foreign objects floating in it. A small buttery dancing rainbow slick, swirling on the surface, the wisps of steam rising toward the sun light and faint but distinct garlic taste mixed with my full bodied tea. Sometimes it is time to throw things out and start over.
Just yesterday I noticed that one of my FB friends posts no longer scrolling across my FB wall, so I did what we all do. I went to her wall to see what she was up to. Much to my dismay she had “unfriended” me. Now, I know this is not supposed to bother me. High school was a long time ago, but the truth is my stomach did that little flip thing similar to what it did just now when I realized I was tasting garlic in my tea. My mind instantly kicked in with, “What did I say that offended her?” I found myself scrolling back through my wall to see what I posted that may have been the culprit. I even found myself hovering over the friend request button wondering if I should send her an apology message. The only problem with that is….. I have no idea what the apology should say.
Now to be honest, I have always been a people pleaser. I will do almost anything to make you like me. But that has often been my undoing. I am trying not to be that way, I feel as though I have spent most of my life apologizing for being on this planet and thinking differently than I should have been thinking. There is always someone who is quick to tell me how wrong my thinking is.
This last week was a prime example with the Supreme Court decision to legalize gay marriage and the little stink about flying the confederate flag. I have an opinion on both but no one really wants to hear my thoughts because everyone has thoughts of their own, which range from, “The world is going to hell in a hand basket!” to, “Finally, equal rights for all!” I actually had a cousin who decided that if South Carolina doesn’t fly the confederate flag than America may as well be a communist country…….Really?! I am a colorblind white girl with some of the bias that I was raised with but I personally think that America’s system is working, albeit slowly and this week has been a prime example of the movement towards more freedom and less hurt. I really think that in the end love will win; at least that is my prayer.
All of the opinions from last week will settle, like bread crumbs. The anger and hostility will brew like the hints of garlic butter swirling to the surface of my tea; the praise for decisions made will rise like steam to meet the sunlight. Yes, I will probably always feel a little sick when I am “unfriended” by someone I really like, but I will simply start over with a new cup, fresh water , a new tea bag, and yes please, a full bodied cup of English Breakfast tea will follow…and in the end Love will win!