I am struck by the idea that dichotomy exists everywhere, that life is found in death, that music is found in silence and yet we hold so tight to one side of the equation without allowing it to balance. Like an algebra problem or a chemical equation, the equation has to be balanced. We must have both light and darkness in our lives. We must struggle and rest. I think that is life. Too much of one without the other and the peace of balance dissolves into chaos.
Yet we as people have a propensity towards one side of the equation. We migrate towards the light, but light all the time would make us crazy. We prefer music but we must have a substantial amount of silence or peace evades our efforts. The age old question remains: How do we achieve balance? Continuing to echo in the canyons or our lives, this question never really goes away it is always in the background with no solid answer.
I lived through, “The Minute Manager era”, where multitasking was the order of the day. I embraced it. I found myself filling my mind with ways to read more books, plan more meals and watch more of my kids basketball games. What ended up happening is I missed many of the day to day joys that sitting quietly would have given me. I was never really present in any one moment because I was always planning and plotting my next activity.
Our society loves this idea, we are always acting busy for our bosses. We cannot let them see us casually talking to a co worker.. I am reminded of a commercial that was popular in the 80’s. It showed a woman saying, “I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget your a man.” I tried to be everything to everybody but in the end I hurt myself. I eventually had nothing left to give.
I tried meditation but I have to admit that I am not as good at sitting with myself, as I am at keeping myself busy. I have learned to sit in the silence of meditation and I have grown. I choose the word meditation because prayer for me, at the time, consisted of a formula that did not require me to be silent.
I admit I started sitting in silence at a time when I was broken beyond repair (at least that is what I thought), but God is good and he pieced my life back together. He taught me many things as he showed me that music exists in silence. He showed me that healing flourishes in darkness and peace is possible.
I have found that by embracing the darkness, and facing the grief that exists in life, allows the light and the happiness to flow through and too me. It seems so counter intuitive but it seems true in my experience. When the highs and lows cease, it is time to embrace grief through tears. Somehow that allows you to dance again.
You are both young and old, happy and sad, peaceful and chaotic! Enjoy the highs and lows of life and when they disappear……embrace the lows to find the highs. Be grateful for the blessings and the struggles. They both play a part in a full life of growth and happiness!